Monday, July 23, 2012

Finding Our Song

As I mentioned previously, Mr. Ly and I have spent a lot of time trying to find our first dance song.  We found our last dance fairly easily, but we still couldn't agree on our first dance.

We needed a plan to narrow down our choices.  We have the habit of putting things off, so we decided we'd take 2 weeks to compile a list of choices. We'd each make a list of our top 5 choices, and then we'd listen to each other's selections, and come together to make a final decision.  (Seriously, did anyone else employ such an intensive process?)  Without this process, we may have ended up with My Sharona as our first dance. (we have seriously discussed this possibility.)

So last Friday, we sat down and listened to each other's choices - separately, so as not sway either of our decisions. We took this VERY seriously. After listening, we came together to discuss and decide.

Without further ado:
Miss Lyre's Top 5:
1. Songbird - Eva Cassidy
2. Heavenly Day - Patty Griffin
3. Keep Warm - Ingrid Michaelson
4. Someone Like You - Van Morrison
5. Hold You in My Arms - Ray Lamontagne 
*Bonus Track* Colors - Grace Potter (I added this as my extra track because I KNEW Mr. Ly would choose this song.)

Mr. Ly's Top 5:
1.  At Last - Etta James 
2. In Your Eyes - Peter Gabriel
3. Colors - Grace Potter (I was RIGHT!)
4. The Luckiest - Ben Folds
5. The Book of Love - Peter Gabriel 

Obviously, we could have just easily agreed on Grace Potter. But we argued our cases for the other songs as well.  Mr. Ly picked a lot of songs that have significance to our relationship, and I picked songs more based on lyrical significance.

I had really been pushing Ingrid Michaelson for a while - I love the lyrics to "Keep Warm"
"Sables and wine till the end of time you give me much more than that
Diamond rings and beautiful things
Oh you give me much more than that
When you smile 

You are mine to keep warm
And it's cold outside but I'm just fine
You are mine to keep warm"

With our winter wedding, and our love of Ingrid (ok, mostly mine - but Mr. Ly does appreciate a lot of her music), I really pushed this song pretty hard. But Mr. Ly just couldn't get behind it. He was ok with any of my other suggestions, but I didn't really push for any of those.

Mr. Ly really pushed for "The Luckiest" and "The Book of Love," both songs I love, and have a strong significance to our relationship.  We were seriously discussing "The Book of Love" but as much as I love Peter Gabriel's version, I'm partial to the Magnetic Fields' version, which Mr. Ly feels is too abrasive sounding. So we had to nix another suggestion. 

Throughout our discussion, we were overlooking our overlapping choice - "Colors" by Grace Potter and the Nocturnals. One of our first concerts together was the XPN music festival, and Grace Potter and the Nocturnals was one of the first acts we saw.  We enjoyed her performace so much that for my birthday that year, Mr. Ly bought us tickets to see her with the Avett Brothers in Baltimore.  I can remember listening to the song both times we saw it performed live, and how at the time, it gave me "love song butterflies" (you know when you're in the early stages of a relationship and you think every love song is just perfect for you and your SO!) It reminds me of a time when we were just discovering our love for each other and we both connect so strongly to this song. We gave our mutual choice one more listen, and decided that this song has the lyrical elements that I love, and the sentimental elements that Mr. Ly loves. So we both agreed that it will be a perfect first dance song.  It is a tad long at 5 minutes, but hopefully our guests don't mind too much! 

"You don't have to ask me why 
Because I know you understand 
All the treasures of my life 
Are right here in my hand 
Suspended in a moment 
No more breath to catch 
If you hold on to your end 
Maybe we can make this last

This is the greatest time of day
When all the clocks are spinning backwards
And all the ropes that bind begin to fray
And all the black and white turns into colors"

And that is how we finally chose our first dance song!  To be honest, we had mentioned it before but we were both certain that there were other songs out there that would be better for us.  Turns out we should have gone with our initial gut, but it was fun taking a musical walk down memory lane, and coming together to select a song that truly is perfect for us. 

Who else had a detailed and organized process for selecting a first dance? Was yours an easy choice or did you have a debate over your choices? 

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